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Is There Hope for the GOP?

Now that Herman Cain has suspended his campaign, there may finally be hope for the GOP.  Since we are finally free from the distraction of such stupid proposals as 9-9-9, we can begin to sift through the platforms and messages for meaning, helping us to select the person who may become the next President of the United States.

For the most part (and by for the most part, I mean everyone except Ron Paul, who we have all been told time and again, either overtly or subliminally through interview questions and the information written on the screen during interviews that he is “unelectable” anyways), we have a pretty sorry bunch of contenders, making it difficult to figure out who to throw our support behind. 

There are the bumbling, the boring, the condescending, and the downright unlikable.  And, if Obama’s election has taught us anything, being president is all about making unsustainable promises and being likable, making it no surprise that voters were throwing their support behind Herman Cain, who seemed to be the only candidate with a shred of personality among the Mitt Romneys of the world.  With those we have to choose from, one can’t help but wonder: Is there hope for the GOP?

Mitt Romney

Mitt Romney reminds us of what it might be like to have Ward Cleaver run for president.  There’s nothing that is really that wrong with him, but there’s nothing really right with him either.  He’s bored the nation into supporting everyone except him.

Newt Gingrich

Possibly one of the best descriptions I ever heard of Newt Gingrich is that he is what stupid people think smart people sound like.  And maybe he really is smart.  You’d have to be pretty flipping smart to rack up over a million dollars in Freddie Mac payouts and still have Americans like you.  And even more so to be a current front-runner for the GOP nomination.  America does not need another contract with Newt Gingrich.

Rick Perry

I’d say something snarky, but it would really just be cruel.  My mother taught me to be nice to the challenged.  In all seriousness, I really do feel bad for him sometimes.